My Emotional Rollercoaster

This post is hard for me to write, partly because I don't know where to begin and partly because I'm afraid of how people will react.

But here it is. I was on the diet for three months. My only symptoms were vaginal YIs, acne, and maybe a little fatigue/brainfog. I didn't score very high on the assessment questionnaire--either mild or moderate, depending on how conservative I was when I took it.

For the first week, die-off symptoms seemed to confirm that I had CRC. I felt like I had the flu, and it was hell for the first ten days or so.

After that, I adhered to the diet as well as I could, but I wasn't necessarily seeing results. My skin actually got worse, and I developed rashes on my legs and arms. I didn't get my period this entire time (three months), so it's possible that that's partly why my acne was such a mess.

But mainly, it was just so much to give up. I admire you all, I really do. But I felt like my life had been taken away from me. I had to make my own meals on the holidays, I couldn't eat with co-workers, and my time was spent planning my next meal, overanalyzing my health like a hypochondriac, or obsessing over things I read about Candida on the internet. During those three months, I realize now that I dropped all my hobbies and passions--I worked, and I obsessed about Candida, and that was it. I also kept entirely to myself. I wouldn't say I was depressed, per se, but I was constantly tense and wound-up and fixated on my health.

So two months go by and I don't feel much better physically and I feel utterly emotionally ravaged. I decide I'm going to go on an ultra-strict version of the diet for a month and see what happens. So for four weeks, I drop all attempts to be creative with my food and basically just eat veggies, meats, and eggs. No nuts, even.

After that time passes and my skin has not improved, I decide I've had enough. I want my life back. So last week, I begin eating yogurt and low-sugar fruits again. Then I get a little more adventurous and add store-bought (but organic! healthy!) things that are mainly okay on the diet but maybe contain a little sugar.

For the past few days, I've been more fatigued than ever. I feel like I have access to about 10% of my brain power. It's as though I'm in a dream all the time, and I honestly almost don't trust myself on the road--that's how impaired I am.

It's a significant problem for me because I'm a writer and my performance at work has been suffering. I just don't have my wits about me.

I'm still waiting for my period to come. I'm 22 so it's really unusual to go this long without a period (I'm not pregnant, haha, it's definitely from cleansing). I also feel extremely depressed and tearful, and I've been having bad cramps, so I wonder if this is just the worst PMS I've ever experienced? Because I didn't feel this bad before the diet. I'm hoping that it's just my body correcting itself.

Any advice or thoughts or just a virtual hug would help so much, you have no idea. I hope you all are doing well in your own journeys, and thank you for listening.
Original Post
Janis, I couldn't read your post and not respond. I am so so sorry to hear all you've been through. Here's a virtual hug! I'm afraid that's all I've got at the moment. I hope Tarilee comes to help with her wisdom soon.

I am just now coming back to the program and the forums. I might have more to contribute later when I've had time to think about your situation and when I don't have 3 kids screaming all around me!

Hang in there, and keep coming back here for support! (Just one thought before I go: Are you taking a good B-vitamin complex? Those can go a LONG way toward helping depression and anxiety.)
Oh my - I am so sorry you are feeling so bad - sendig you a virtual hug hearthrob

Treating candida can be very difficult and frustrating and unfortunately it is not an upward, steady climb - there can be lots of ups and downs - and times when you don't see much (if any) progress. But I believe that even during those times your body is working hard to heal and restore balance. The problem for us is that this does take time - I am not a patient person - but this process is teaching me patience.

I have had terrible rashes on my hands and thighs. They were so bad on my hands that people would ask me if I had been burned. They were red, raised and crusty, itchy and burned. I would hide my hands as much as I could. The rashes on my thighs were the same but much larger - fortunately I could hide them.

I have been on this program for almost four months and the rashes on my hands are almost gone (no longer have to hide them) and my thighs are much better.

But I have been on an ultra strict version of the diet - as you have described it. Eggs, protein and vegetables. On the weekend I sometimes experiment - mostly with beans and occasionally grains - this allows my body to tell me what it does and does not like. But come Monday - I am back on the strict diet again. I am not sure how long I will have to do this - time will tell.

The good thing is that I am learning again to listen to my body. I think that during this process we have to change how we view a "normal life" - and what we once thought was "normal" is now different - and much better for us.

Do you have a good naturopathic physician that you can work with? That may be helpful in sorting all of this out for you. It can be hard to try to figure it out all on your own.

You are very young - and I commend you for being aware of the importance of healing your body - I wish I had been more that way when I was young.

I am sure that Tarilee and others will respond with recommendations and encouragement.

Hang in there and take care - Susan
Janis - just another thought - are you doing things to help your body detox?

What I have found that has been helpful for me -*dry skin brushing (avoided my rash areas when they were really bad),
*epsom salt baths (stopped when my rashes were too bad - ready to start again), *rebounding (this is great - gets the lymph moving), and
*castrol oil packs (love these - especially in winter when it is cold and great for the liver).

And of course liver support supplements - Whole Approach has some good ones.

Just something to think about if you haven't already.

Janis I am so sorry for what you are going through right now. Just know that we have all been there or are still there. This can be a slow process and getting better doesn't happen overnight.

You don't mention what products you were taking, as far as antifungals or the Bentonite and Psylium. Perhaps it was too much.

I hope you are able to find some balance with everything and you start feeling better soon. HUGS!!
Dear Janis
You have described such effort, perserverance and sacrifice- its no wonder you feel deflated. Don't kick yourself too hard, you have done alot of positive things. I can't imagine doing such a strict regime as this in my youthful early twenties so I respect you so much and I'm sure you have adopted this diet and lifestyle because your life began unmanageable dealing with everything with the candida.
I do belive stress and worry alters the chemical nature of the body that allows candida to thrive so when a naturopath told me to calm down and do relaxationy things and not worry ( trust the process) I felt more frustrated- i felt anything but calm! I too wanted results. I think there has been some good supportive advice so far from members.

I would like to add that if you have leaky gut, food sesntivity is going to be high and also it would be hard to gain weight- the gut needs to be healed. Also I found out a couple of months ago that antifungals, such as Capryl and GSE particularly diminish the enzyme production, so food doesnt get digested properly leading to leaky gut, constipation and then the constipation makes dormant food go purtid, relases more toxins and feeds the candida. Enzymes saved me from acidosis, reflux and indigestion and allowed me to gain weight again. They have some good ones on this wesbite.

The Smooth operator has the L-Glutimine that can help heal your gut too.
It was mentioned to me that if you have had this condition for a while the body takes a while to rebalance- i still dont have my periods back. If youve stuck to the program for months and still dont feel better its possibly time to investigate thyroid, hrmone imbalances, food allergies heavy metals, parasites- as candida could just be a symptom of something else. Less severe candida overgrowth would correct itself with this program and good quality enzymes and probiotics- its darn expensive but it means getting your life back and at 22 you so deserve that.xx
Wow, thank you all for your prompt and heartfelt replies (and virtual hugs! hearthrob ). I actually wish I had waited a day before complaining so much, because I feel loads better today--more alert, more balanced, and finding my way back to inner peace.

I'm starting to think that it just might not be the right time in my life to embark on this journey towards total healthfulness. I am moving to New Orleans this Saturday, and while I don't plan on going crazy and indulging in all sorts of harmful foods, the food is such a big part of the culture there! And I don't want to miss out on those shared experiences. I'm going to take care to avoid things like bread and sugar, and I'll stick to high quality whole foods; but since I'm lucky enough not to have a particularly debilitating case of CRC, I'm going to let myself off the hook for awhile.

These past few months have taught me an important lesson about the desire for control versus letting go. I think you're right, Auraeyah - I think stress and obsessiveness can absolutely be counterproductive. And until I figure out how to address these problems without stressing out so much, I am choosing my emotional health over my physical health. Just temporarily. You have to pick your battles, I guess.

Jenelle, I'll definitely look into a vitamin B-complex. I actually haven't been taking any vitamins lately, and I've heard that vitamin B is good for the skin, so that help me out a lot.

Michelle, thanks for the kind words. I was taking the Attogram protocol regimen that Whole Approach offers. I took it religiously for the full three months, along with Pau D'Arco tea. I'm not sure if I was doing too much at once, but I would have thought I'd have seen more significant improvement.

Susan, thanks for the advice - I definitely want to see a naturopath at some point. I was doing this all myself, and that's partly why it was so maddening. New Orleans seems to be low on naturopaths/holistic practitioners, but I'll see what I can do. It would really help to have some guidance.

And thank you for the support, Auraeyah, I really needed that! I think that investigating those other issues you mentioned makes a lot of sense, too.

Hi Janis,

I feel like you and I are going through very similar events. I started this diet mid November and started phase one a few weeks ago along with Pau d'Arco which I recently cut out since it's too much. I tried this a couple years ago but just didn't have space for it in my life, then got worse, and now have become hyperfocused on getting better. And my days completely revolve around making sure I'm following protocol to the point where it's becoming an obsession and a real life deja vu.

I just moved to a new town in October but feel like my adventurous spirit and desire to go out and make new friends has diminished to a hermit lifestyle. And the restaurants I was so excited to try, and the few that I did try and fell in love with, well, those are off limits. I hate it and I hate that I could have taken care of this years ago but didn't. And I hear you on the writing. I'm a writer too and this lifestyle change has really affected my concentration and output. I read sentences over and over again but for the life of me I can't figure out if they are constructed properly. And I have become the queen of excuses and redirection when people ask me about my writing progress.

But here's the other side of all of this. I am, for the first time in my life, finally doing something about constantly feeling sick. And I consider myself, and everyone else here, lucky because the way I feel has given me the push to recognize that my system is out of balance to the point where I want to make a change. Most people never get to that point because they just don't recognize what's going on in their own body. I retook the Candida questionnaire today and I've dropped from a 400 to a 346. It was disappointing at first. But then, that's 54 points in the right direction and I have definitely earned every single point. And I earned those points through the holidays where I also had to make my own food while my family consistently ate without waiting for me and continually offered me cookies, cakes, candies, bread, no matter how many times I told them no and showed them my list.

So as hard as all of this is, and as much as I sometimes hate it, I know I'm on the right track. And I think you're on the right track too. With a move coming up it's a good call to focus on that emotional health, get settled, and then reassess your health when you're good and ready. You are already aware of what your body is going through and that is the first step. Stay as healthy as you can, go easy on yourself, and when you're ready to go for it again you have all this previous knowledge to guide you-and an awesome forum Smile

And maybe get some tests for food allergies. A lot of mine caused really bad brain fog and acne. I had something done called provocation/neutralization where you get injections of different serums. It's time consuming so clear your daily schedule, but the results are a good starting point and eventually you can rotate those foods back into your diet after you've healed your gut.

Good luck with your move and stay strong in that epicurean atmosphere.


One more thing, well two because I forgot a virtual hug. hearthrob

The kind of acne I have, though it's really gotten better once I cut out foods I'm allergic to, was cystic acne. Within 24 hours of eating an egg or wheat I would flare up bad and my skin would not heal for about a month. I had an egg a month ago, same thing. I think you said you were eating them. Maybe test out to see if you are reacting.
Chiming in and agreeing about the eggs. I don't do well with eggs. My sister does not do well with eggs. I would really make an effort to cut them out for, say, a week or so and then have them again and pay close attention to how it makes you feel. You may be surprised! Or you may not notice a difference -- but it is certainly worth a try.

You say you haven't been taking any vitamins? Yes, I highly recommend a good B-vitamin complex. Nature's Sunshine makes one called "Nutri-Calm" that is GREAT. I have a good friend who went through a really rough time, feeling like her Zoloft wasn't working anymore, trying a new med and having AWFUL experience with that new med. Awful. I got her started on Nutri-Calm and she went back on her Zoloft, and she says it has made a WORLD of difference. No one had ever talked to her about the importance of B vitamins. Seriously, please do this for yourself right away!

I was also thinking of making sure you are getting enough EFA's. I was going to recommend flax oil, but after thinking about your female concerns -- I would recommend trying some Evening Primrose Oil. It is known to help prevent PMS, it relieves pain and inflammation, enhances the release of sex hormones -- including estrogen and testosterone -- and helps with menopausal symptoms such as hot flashes. So this one just makes sense to me for your situation. I'm sure Tarilee will correct me if I am wrong about this! Smile
Hello Janis,

So it sounds like your symptoms were low to moderate and then higher after you changed your diet. Darn! How frustrating!Usually, when people go on a different diet and eliminate the junk and sugar sources- removing deep fried and processed oils and sugars and excess sugars,- there is almost always an improvement. Usually they discover that one or more of these foods have been contributing to candida growth and or other health-suppressing symptoms. I wonder if, alternately for you, you actually discovered that you are allergic to one of the key foods that you've been leaning heavily on since starting the WA diet. Can you list a few typical days worth of foods and I can give you some feedback? If you do choose to do this, please be as specific as you can about whether foods are organic or additive free.

Your old life being taken away from you at twenty two is a tough thing to deal with. I can completely and entirely empathize with you and usually, when we're just 'ticking away' perfectly happy with things before our health crashes, change is especially unwelcome. I've been in the place of resistance to change and resistance to renunciation. But, just like in the uncommon enlightened approach to a benefit-to-self focused renunciation that one might choose in pursuit of the feeling of integrity or "settledness" of mind of draining choices (like gossip for instance), there is a much deeper benefit to be had when we are in tune with the positive reasons for giving up certain foods.

Like with renunciation, as opposed to just doing so because something or someone like a authority says we 'should', when we choose to give up foods that are toxic to our bodies, if we can do so because of how good we will feel if we replace them, we can stick to the change more easily and benefit more. It's subtle, but deeply important that we emphasize the benefits as opposed to how bad we will feel if we don't give them up because it bypasses the 'should' state of mind that we in turn resist.

Above, Atta said something very wise that I'd like to touch on,

"***the push to recognize that my system is out of balance to the point where I want to make a change. Most people never get to that point because they just don't recognize what's going on in their own body. ****

This is a very true statement about the gift of illness, no matter how unwanted it always is, it, in the end, brings a gift. The even tougher thing about illness in this day and age is that we are surrounded by societies saturated with addiction and acceptance of many daily choices that are slowly reducing our lifespan and quickly killing our quality of life and connection to our ability to feel our natural joy and vitality. It's not just our health or diet that is out of balance. Right now, it is many globally controlled systems that impact our wellbeing and need to change. As with diet originated problems, often illness is our first teaching. Once we feel bad and start to learn about some of the choices (albeit many of them unknowingly) we're making that might be contributing to how poorly we feel, we learn that there are healthier ways of living.

In the current stream of people's choices pushing the market and crowds in the opposite direction, the healthier choices require by comparison to theirs, much more research, hunting, experimentation and financial investment. However, what we're doing is eating and shopping for our own well being as well as for the well being of our entire society and the more we learn about the wide reaching impacts of our food choices, the more we'll want to do things differently.

By starting to eat differently, you are actually beginning the process of shopping activism. You are helping to take back our food supply by demanding healthier, more ethical choices that take better care of our bodies and of the people and land that supply the food. It may feel like over-analyzing your health and your food right now and others may label it hypochondriac. But you're engaging in an essential questioning process and you're seeing more deeply into what you are eating and how it is impacting your body. Changing how we eat can change our mental health chemistry through good nutrition and reduced allergic response but it can also be profoundly important as a means to change our world- both our immediate and our global community. I cannot underestimate the amount of courage it takes any of you to address these changes in your world, especially in the midst of the intense speed at which most of us are living. And, at the same time, I cannot overstate the value in what you are doing.

For you Janis, you've not immediately seen the benefits and you're faced with a lasting problem so this is frustrating right now. But don't give up. You've begun the process of seeking answers about cause and effect. You cannot ever stop looking differently at food or health and you will continue to learn more valuable, and often hard, truths about food.

It will affect your social life and whom you choose for new friends and it will affect family gatherings. The more you learn about food, the more you will also learn about relationships, our impact on one another, group think and ways of using gentle rhetorical choices to drop tiny bits of awareness and curiosity wherever we go.

For now, your focus needs to be on the answers you need for your own health. Candida treatment and a completely pure, hypo-allergic diet (customized for you) may be all you need to find an outrageously great level of health. Or, if things are more complex in your body right now, you may also find yourself exploring other, related aspects of health.

Regardless of how well you become through diet, you may choose to seek optimum, whole-life health because of your new found respect for the value and importance of wellness. You may learn about electro magnetic fields. You may learn about indoor air quality and, to help you find peace of mind, you may also learn about self regulation and meditation. These transitions of awareness are just a few of those that can bring a great sense of meaning and conviction to your world that has the potential to feed important change around you and will empower your health resilience to a degree you might have difficulty imagining from your current position.

Let's just start with getting your diet in order and get you feeling a bit better and trust that this is likely the most important element to pushing you through the recovery you need. If you're feeling up to taking the next step, please do post some days worth of your food diary and we'll start there with seeing what you can try next.

Virtual hug!!!


PS, I agree with the support of B-vitamins and nutritional balancing. It's important to make sure your vitamins are from gmo free sources. Dr Ron from Yellow Sun vitamin co has assured us his products are gmo free and a daily dose of his multi represents a complete, high potency B vitamin supplement as well.
Thank you for sharing, Atta! It sounds like we've really had similar experiences.

And Jenelle, thanks for your advice. I'll pick up a good vitamin B-complex and some of the oil soon.

Okay, I've made an appointment with a naturopath in New Orleans and I'm planning to get an allergy test done. I can't keep doing this alone. I just don't think a greater degree of obsessiveness and more experimentation are going to help. I'm straight up going to drive myself insane.

I've broken out my diary, and Tarilee, I have a feeling you're going to get mad at me for not rotating foods. I did do so for awhile, but it didn't make a discernible difference, so I stopped. And you're right, I relied heavily on eggs. But a few times I stopped eating eggs and my acne was still bad. I haven't eaten eggs in the last two days and I'm having a horrible breakout right now, for example. Grrrrrrr.

Just to reiterate, I don't consider myself a particularly bad case (I don't have digestive problems or anything). At this point I'm not even 100% convinced that my problems stem from Candida. Now I'm starting to wonder if it's all allergies.

Here's a random log of three days from when I was really restricting my carbs:


-2 hard-boiled eggs
-Chicken with broccoli and onion, cooked in olive oil
-Beef with broccoli and onion, cooked in olive oil

-2 eggs
-Green beans oven-roasted in coconut oil with garlic
-Lamb, asparagus, zucchini

-3 eggs
-oven-roasted cauliflower
-beef with broccoli, cooked in olive oil

Everything was organic.

Hmm, I did eat a lot of eggs, huh? I'll definitely forswear them for now, but like I said, it hasn't made much of a difference in the past.
Okay, hang on a minute. How long can allergy symptoms last? I only took breaks from questionable foods for a week at a time at the most, and then I would still break out and get frustrated. Is it possible that I was having allergic reactions during those times? My mind, she is blown.
Dearest Janis,
You've described perfectly what many of us have gone through beginning this journey to health. Like you, I became somewhat obsessive, at first, regarding the protocol - to the extent that some of my friends were completely put out with me. BUT, by the middle of Phase II (GSE) I hit my stride and have felt better since that time (last June)than I can remember in my entire 55 years in this body.
Tarilee's words really rang true for me - we make the choice for health. No one is depriving us or forcing us out of what we considered normal. I've learned that my judgements about normal have to be adjusted often...LOL!! That said, I think your reactions are NORMAL. When I was at the lowest in Phase I of the protocol, I got a big lift by reading through some of the older posts. A woman named Sharon called this the "Eye of Newt" diet and I still laugh until the tears run down my legs at the thought!
Please do not dispair. New Orleans is a great city with a wonderful natural healthcare system and tons of fresh's not all street vendor junk (cajun from LA). Treat yourself to some spa time - sounds like a massage would do you good. Like with any personal improvement efforts, we must reward ourselves with healthy prizes. WA offers a St.Francis herbal cream for skin sensitivies, zinc and chamomile, that is wonderful. I used it during the first 6 or 7 months of the protocol - it saved me from quitting more than once. And I may be speaking out of school here, but in reading through the older posts I think most of us (I know I have) have had to take some time off and regroup. Please, don't beat yourself up about it, else I might start feeling guilty, too...ha-ha.
Best of luck to you in your new city - moving can be quite stressful so be gentle with yourself and know that you have tons of support here. Sending you all the healing energies you can stand...
Hi Janis,

Congrats on making an appointment with an ND. Did you find our post in the Protocol FAQ section that guides you through the interview and selection process when looking for a practitioner to guide you with your yeast cleanse?

Before you decide what kind of allergy tests to get done, please go to the newsletter section and read the article at the bottom of the page about food allergies and candida.

You're not alone and, as Atta says, your responses to all the changes are completely natural. Only you know at what speed you can embrace new ideas and new habits. You may be an overnight - all or nothing -jump in with both feet sort of person or you may need time to consider new ideas, and delve into the theory and understanding deeply before trying them. If so, you may wish to list the changes you want to make, consider the elements involved and then schedule each component of the change and experimentation so you can sustain some familiar ground while walking through your transition.

And congrats for filling in the diary. This is a difficult yet profound learning tool! And, of course I won't "get mad at you." Nope, it's not a response I've ever had to helping someone transition to healthier living so no worries there. I'm here to support you, not to blame you. In fact, I'm also here to help you stop blaming yourself and to encourage you to develop an affectionate, understanding voice for your inner self to help you be gentle with your own change.

You may not need to rotate, this is only necessary for those with leaky gut issues and extreme allergies. I do recommend a general awareness of the risk of developing new allergies (which you'll read about in the allergies article) and thus it's a good idea to hold the intention of switching up the proteins, and starches (meats, nuts, seeds & grains) that you rely on.

In your diary, I do not see any of the starch sources from the OK list or the diet instructions that encourage some sources of veggie or alternative grain foods. I don't recommend a carb free diet, which is essentially what you've developed. Your emotional/mental health and immune system need some carbs and if you restrict them too much, your system can also become too acidic (acidosis)- resulting in multiple health risks. Please consider the diet instructions here as you move forward.

If acne is one of your symptoms, I'd look to dairy sources first but other proteins like eggs could also be related. A general, irritated and slowed digestive function could also be related as could many other non yeast related challenges (like birth control hormones, other hormone imbalance, liver congestion etc...the ND can help you with these) If you read the article on Healing Crises, also in the newsletter section, you'll see that acne is one of the temporary consequences of cleansing, which happens once we switch to a therapeutic diet. So there can be periods of confusion where we have to guess as to whether the acne is a sign of continued exposure to a stressor or due to the flushing out of related's never possible to be positive. Learning to listen to and understand our bodies is an art and it takes time and lots of self love and methodical observation to learn yet it's an essential skill in a world full of so many possible unhealthy choices where we need to customize our own unique self care according to what we learn about our bodies.

You could discover that your symptoms are purely allergy related and/or yeast related or that this is just a part of what you need to learn about improving your health. I can't make any claims about the universal powers of diet though of course (as you know already), I believe very strongly in healing with foods.

If allergy is your issue, there are some foods that are high residue and/or have long lasting inflammatory impacts so for these, you'd need to eliminate them for up to four weeks to see a significant impact. And, if you eliminate a food that has been a really big problem for you, (e.g. dairy or gluten), you might find that after eight weeks, you're still seeing improvement.

This process of elimination and provocation that is described in the allergies article is not a simple one and there are many confounding factors that make our record keeping essential. With awareness of how complex this is I have come up with a design for a software to help people track responses but have not yet found someone to pull it together for me. For now, your innovation and concentration will be very useful in the process.

Diet hints:

Digestion is easier if only one protein food is eaten at each meal (i.e. either egg OR meat OR nuts OR beans)

As much variety as you can afford and plan for is best. A mix of raw and cooked is helpful as well. And, as I mentioned above, you need some carbs from the recommended lists.

I hope this is helpful to you. Good luck with the next few days of exploring and, with all you've got on the go in a new city, do please be gentle with how fast you push your change process. Again, keeping a record of your changes can be useful here as it will help you recognize just how much you've been doing in terms of daily work to be well. This is something that will help you to validate your business and understand why sometimes you will feel overwhelmed with complexity and change. Moving in itself requires constant solution-seeking and changing your diet and lifestyle while adjusting to a new place with unknown resources will just take time and patience!

Stay in touch,


it doesn't have to be hard but it takes an open mind for sure. detox: borax yes the stuff on the laundry aisle. it is a miracle cure, it heals in your gut which is what u have to tackle. another thing thats easy. budwig protocol: she was a german physicist she found that when combining flaxseed oil and cottage cheese it cured cancer. no joke she went to the government to prove it. it fills you up as well. the sad thing: we live in a  society that doesn't want it's people happy or healthy. information has been surpressed from us. luckily you can't keep everyone down and there are people in this world who have discovered or created amazing advantages for us. I've done years of researching and finding i have accumulated mass findings to heal people. if there is a will there IS a way.  beliefs are just a thought you keep telling yourself, if you don't like something change the way you think about it. 

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