Throughout this whole period of CRC treatment, the worst problem I've had is staying focused and organized, because my ability to think straight is always the first thing to go when I have a bad day, which leads to worse. Whenever this happens, I've depended on the support of loved ones, particularly my boyfriend who would cook my meals when I was too tired, and help me get refocused on taking my treatments.
This past week, my Dad and his girlfriend, infinite sources of support to me, have moved several states away (and I'm happy for them). And now, my boyfriend has decided that our relationship doesn't work anymore, and one of us will probably be moving out. I'm heartbroken and depressed, and worried now that I won't be able to pick myself back up when I fall, or fend off the people who insist that this diet is crazy and I should've given it up by now, that I'm an obsessed hypochondriac.
Now I'm in a viscious cycle of depression leading to not taking care of myself leading to worse symptoms leading to deeper depression, and now I'm trying to fight a sinus infection before it gets bad enough to need antibiotics. I can't stand whining so much, or spreading negativity like this, but I feel lost.